2025.2.3
The fine rain taps against the glass, and the scattered shadows of umbrellas slowly drift in the gray sky. The Ethereum crash notification pushed by my phone pierces the screen, and the red number of my account balance freezes at 327.68. The rain threads weave a curtain of water on the window frame, entangling my struggles with the desolation of the street scene.
This shouldn't be my ending, right?
From the key high school in the county town to the Cherry Blossom Avenue at Wuhan University, and then to the all-night lights of the Hong Kong University library, I clearly hit every step precisely at each turning point. But now, sitting in the rented room, even the electricity balance reminds me of my failure.
Fourteen months ago, when I smashed my bank ID badge, I was so decisive; now, staring at the trading interface, I feel so dazed. The 200,000 principal earned through 996 work hours once swelled to a dizzying 1.27 million in the cryptocurrency wave. Those nights spent discussing in Discord channels, the bitterness of coffee while watching the market at three in the morning, all turned into the fluctuating numbers on the candlestick chart.
From ORDI to PEPE, I perfectly timed every narrative cycle. Until last December, when the BOME white paper went viral in the crypto community, I seemed to see the second Dogecoin myth beckoning. A buying price of 0.008, an additional purchase at 0.007, a leverage doubling at 0.005... This morning, that guillotine-like bearish candle swept my three years of savings along with my parents' retirement funds into the digital abyss.
The most ironic part is that last month when I went home, I confidently painted a bright future for my parents. My mother's hesitation when withdrawing fixed deposits, my father's trembling fingers while transferring money through mobile banking, all turned into sharp blades stirring in my heart. They always say, "Money sitting idle will depreciate," yet they don't know their son has pushed them into a deeper whirlpool of depreciation.
At the New Year's Eve dinner table, my relatives' gazes were like scanners, trying to decipher the reality from my GUCCI belt and dark circles. The term "blockchain finance" sounded increasingly pale amidst the clinking of glasses. My uncle's remark, "Studying hard is not as good as a stable job," wafted over with the scent of Maotai, and I found myself unable to muster a rebuttal.
Now, staring at the trading pair list, every cryptocurrency seems to mock my naivety. The depth chart of BOME/USDT resembles a cliff; those bots still active at three in the morning, who are they paving the wealth ladder for? When new coins being listed and immediately crashing becomes the norm, the gainers list on the exchange homepage feels like a carefully orchestrated black humor.
The rain continues to fall, and the pothos on the windowsill droops. Suddenly, the notification sound from the trading software rings out— is it a system alert for forced liquidation, or a pump alert for some altcoin? I can no longer distinguish these sounds, just as I can't tell whether the water flowing down my face is rain or something else. Those paths to financial freedom once sketched in white papers have now melted into mist, blurring both the phone screen and the future.
@Original Nezha | Sigma Hunter Σ
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